#WalkingIdentityCrisis

When it comes to popular 3 word phrases, this is my top choice to blurt out whilst scrolling through social media! Lol

So today, I'm turning the tables on myself. It's time to call myself out ya'll.. I'm hoping I'm not alone here, which makes sharing my "Hot Mess-ness" so much easier!

This blog topic sparked because of a convo I had with my neighbor a while back. She is in her late 40's. Married a Pro-Athlete for 2 decades and had 4 kiddos, she's a super awesome chick and always makes me laugh - BUT it was a guarantee that in every convo she WOULD bring up the fact that she was an Ex-NFL Cheerleader. She did it for 6 seasons, back in the 90's. I got the sense that she brings it up, because she thinks its the most exciting/interesting thing about her. I so badly want to tell her that I think she's freaking amazing just as she is. I don't care

If you asked me "Carrie, who are you?" I would almost immediately respond "I'ma Single Mom of the best kids on the planet!"

D'awww how cute is that, right? So proud of Motherhood that I totally neglect to answer the ACTUAL question.

I wasn't asked what I did.

I wasn't asked what my favorite things in life are.

I wasn't asked what accomplishments I'm most proud of.

I was asked WHO I AM...

Once you sit and really think about that question, the answer can leave you feeling SUPER confused...

I think, socially speaking, it's pretty normal to attach our worth to what we do, what we offer the world, what we've accomplished and what we provide. But that's so freaking far from the core of who we are! I mean, if you got into a horrible weed wacker accident and lost your arms and legs (it was a very powerful weed wacker, okay?) and you couldn't walk or feed yourself - what would you say when someone asked you "Who are you?"....

If we strip away what we do, who in the shizzle are we really??

And that's where the Identity Crisis comes in.. Years and years of attaching ourselves to what we do - leaves us digging ourselves deeper and deeper into a trench we eventually can't get out of without a whole lot of struggle. Struggle is another word for Life Crisis...

If your whole life is dedicated to your job. You've been there since your graduated and you have sacrificed everything to climb the ladder of success within the corporation. And then one day, they lay you off... That anxiety, sense of loss, depression - all comes from the fact that you attach WHO YOU WERE to what you did.

Professional Athletes & Movie Stars are a great example as well.

So here's the trick I've found that really helps to get to the answer of WHO AM I!?

Make a list of all the things that you think make YOU you.

I'll wait....

Now, go over that list and cross off EVERY adjective... (Single Mom, Divorcee, Widow, Strong, Smart, Protective, Black, Brown etc)

***All those words are really just your EGO popping up to tell the world what you are, so you can feel special. Within this blog, we are detaching from the ego, because the truth is - you were born worthy, brought into this world deserving. You were a brand new baby, couldn't even feed yourself and EVEN THEN you were a blessing and a gift. somewhere along the way, we got this idea that we had to do stuff to earn that worthiness - that's a lie.

Now, strip away any action words. Any words that focus on what you DO (especially for a living) - get rid of em! (Hard-working, dedicated, fast running, comical, well-spoken etc)

***All those words are Capt. Ego coming back into the mix, trying to show the world that what we do is what makes us magical. Another lie. Our value is not attached to what we do. We are not what we get paid to do.

Okay so, whats left?

Here's what I have:

"I am a child of God, here on Earth to share my gifts, my purpose and my truth!"

Now listen, as cheesy as that phrase initially sounds, think about how everlasting it is! I mean, am I going to refer to myself as a "Single Mother" when I'm 80 and my children are all in their 40's?? Am I going to reference a radio career that ended 5 decades earlier when I'm 90 year old??

My point is, be mindful of what titles you attach your worth to. Watch out what you label yourself. Because all things end, and where will you be when you don't have those things to cling to? So, get to the core of WHO YOU ARE and I promise you, you will stop feeling like a #WalkingIdentityCrisis depending on the direction the waves of life takes you!

xoxo C.Mo