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For as long as I can remember, I've kept some kind of a journal. I got a diary in every Easter basket growing up, and I'd make it my mission to fill those bad boys up with all of my deepest tweenage thoughts by Summer! When you are as talkative as I am, people tend to hand you blank pages with the instruction to "Go on ahead and write all that down, kiddo!" What I loved most, was looking back at all the progress I had made, how my views changed over time and how those moments you SWORE you'd never make it thru, became the moments you realized your own strength! So, buckle up - I've got endless Easter basket diary knowledge to drop on ya! 

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#MotherFreakinCelery

  • Jan 12, 2019
  • 2 min read

Ugh... Well, they finally got me! I fought them long and hard but in the end, I succumbed. Last year was all about beets and I found that shit with every once of strength I had because beets taste like blood, soil and happy people's tears. Oh man, beets are NASTY AF don't @ me either because at some point even you beet lovers had a first bite and thought "Well this tastes like shit!"

I hold celery in the same category at beets, filed under NASTY AF. I've never been a fan, always pick them out of my salads and walk fast AF by them at the farmers market! Until this daggone Medical Medium guy hit the scene and everyone started freaking out over the wonders of stupid freaking celery! I've tried to trace back the moment things went bad for me and celery, because I definitely remember eating those "Bumps On A Log" snacks as a child.




You know the ones, celery slapped with a gob of peanut butter and then the strategically placed raisins plopped on top? Oh yeah, I ate the shit outta those growing up! Then at some point I betrayed that celery bond and they grossed me out! Well it really doesn't matter now because I'm back in the celery game now.. After reading up like crazy about the benefits of celery juice, like liver detox, help reverse acne, helps reduce hypertension and headaches, and its a total gall bladder rehabilitator! (the kicker was skin detox... I'm a sucker for a good skin detox) I'm doing an 8 ounce glass of freshly juiced celery a day. See, just that sentence alone killed every boner within a mile of me! There is NOTHING sexy about celery! It's like the sweaty gym sock of the vegetable world! But I'm in. I'm doing it. 10 days of celery juice... Let's see how this shit show plays out shall we? I'm semi-excited to see what changes I notice, because everyone is saying celery works fast as a detox.

And it's supposed to work wonders on your live function, and so many people are saying it totally cures acid reflux - which I totally suffer from time to time. For those that know, I'm OBSESSIVE with my Instagram Stories, every insignifigant moment of my day is journaled over there so if you want to follow how my next week goes ingesting the sweaty testicle socks of the veg family aka celery - Follow Me HERE! Let's do this! oxo C.Mo

 
 
 

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