#6SignsYouDatePsychos

I'm not one to brag, but I pretty much have a street certified PhD in what I like to lovingly refer to as "Spot-A-Psycho-logy". Just like real-life college - I earned this fantastical degree with nothing but gut-wrenching, mind boggling, personal experience! Out in these streets, donating my vagina to science (if you will)! Taking relationship bullets alllllll so I could bring you nuggets of wisdom, while sparring you the heart ache (I'm such a giver :)!

I should hop on Etsy and have someone crafty - design a laminated "Spot-A-Psycho-Logist" badge, so when I speak on this topic, I can bust it out and people will know I'm LEGIT! I could probably title this blog, 47 Signs - but let's be realistic here - we all have shit to do, so I am gonna hit the highlights for now!

Sign 1. If they don't have a close friendship with anyone they've known longer than 10 years, bruh----> #ThatsASign . "Close Friendship" means they speak at least once a month, and the friend is present at any major life events (weddings, child births, deaths etc). I've dated guys who literally haven't a ever had a best friend or even a friend they hung out with every couple months, that's another HUGE red flag for me... If they don't even have 1 friend thats kiiiiiinda-sorta around for the last decade+, you know there's something funky about your person. In my experience, that usually means they've fucked over everyone they've crossed paths with, to the extent that no one even gives a shit about them enough to call or visit with them! Take the i out of ruin and RUN!

Sign 2. If they have an extreme co-dependent relationship dynamic with their opposite sex parents,

oh snap ---> #ThatsASign . You're probably like "What the hell is an Extreme Relationship Carebear, Do Tell??!" Ok let me first say.. Obviously if there is NO relationship with the opposite sex parent, that may be out of your person's control, lots of absentee parents running around out there and you can't blame the child for that - but I'm saying, it can still negatively effect your S/O in bad ways. Remember, that opposite sex parent relationship is the most influential relationship a child has in those formative years, so the absence of a positive role model is pretty detrimental once the child becomes and adult and starts taking out their issues on innocent men/women. On the flip side, if they have an over-the-top relationship with their opposite sex parent that's super co-dependent and consuming - GOOD GOD run and run fast.. If they're dependent on their Mom or Dad beyond the social norms (aka - still live together or they're the only person the other one has, so one is always calling the other for random shit ... That ain't healthy) or their parent is dependent on them beyond norms, that's not even remotely healthy. Lot's of single moms treat their sons like husbands they never had, and those boys grow up to be mother-flippin PSYCHO! If you feel like you're sharing your S/O's time and attention with their parent, #ThatsASign. The reason I chose this one, is because kids are kids until they're adults, and when they become adults they should have set boundaries with the parentals. I've noticed that grown ass men who don't have that independent boundary ARE FREAKING DELUSIONAL and very much accustomed to all of the opposite sex interactions to be how they are with Mama/Papa!

Sign 3. If they're super weird about money ---> Yep, you caught a psycho and #ThatsASign . So this can be either extreme, they're either SUPER over the top cheap and pride themselves on being cheap - thats not about the money, that's about their psycho-ness (just made that word up and plan to use it 3x day until Websters Dictionary makes it official) and psycho's like to control! If they want you to foot the bill for stuff that builds THEIR image... #ThatsASign . If they want to control YOUR money, and start to depend a liiiiiiiiitle too much on your income over their own for expenses - Black Beauty --->run like the wind! If they want to purchase things, but put them in your name... #ThatsASign . If super early on in your relationship; they wine and dine you to the point where you start to wonder where the heck they got the money to fund it all - RED FLAG. Or immediately want to make financial commitment-type moves (buy cars, buy houses, share bank accounts etc) with the constant promise that you're doing all of this because "Duh babe, we will always be together anyway, so it;s no biggie blahhhhh" Lord Almighty ---> #ThatsASign . If you ignore your gut and make all those big purchases, and they almost immediately quit their job, or stop working towards whatever professional goal they were going for that made you fall for them early on ---> Yuppers, #ThatsASign . If all their purchase revolve around Image, meaning - they buy all the shit that makes them LOOK a certain way, and its obvious how they look matters more than who they truly are - You bagged yourself a psycho. If you notice that they spend money freely on themselves, but skrimp and buy the cheapest possible alternatives for everyone else - Next Stop on the Psycho Tour - Your Life! #ThatsASign

Sign 4. If they bash their exes - HUGE SIGN... And I mean, go out of the way to speak negatively about their exes - watch that shit closely. Everyone has something to say about their exes, thats human nature. But if they start telling you super deep details that lets you know they were OVERLY & OBSESSIVELY wrapped up in getting into their exes life - proceed with caution. If they regularly check their exes social media, reach out to THEIR exes, seem to bring up the ex in convo when they weren't even the topic - Please go to your closest Nike store and get yourself some running shoes! Not only is that shit psycho, thats some tell-tale Narcissism you're looking at. I have never gotten serious with a guy who bashes his ex, because I know there's 2 sides to a story and if he's talking horribly about her to me, he will talk horribly about me to the next chick!

Sign 5. If they try to control weird shit about your life, really super early on #ThatsASign . It may feel like they're overly critical and "Ahh its just because they love me so much" But nope! If you feel like you walk on eggshells, around them and they're constantly trying to control the most random things you do like, what you eat, what clothing you wear, how you clean specific things, the music you listen to - you get my drift --->#ThatsASign . If they have the delusion that their way is the only way to properly do things, PSYCHO-ALERT!

Sign 6. This is a HUGE one. If they lie about things you know about RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU and expect you to play along #ThatsASign the size of the freaking Gotham City Bat Signal! If you're sitting with friends at dinner and your guy/gal tells a story with OBVIOUS discrepancies to make themselves look more favorable, and they do it right in front of you - fully expecting you to nod your head in fake agreement... Run Forrest Run! You can tell yourself maybe they're confused, maybe they got the story jumbled blahhhh but if their lies a) make them the victim or b) make them look like the better-man in the story -- CooCoo Loco Looney Tunes Psychopath!

Ohhhh I'm dying to hear YOUR signs - post in the comments and I'll be here waiting with my Handy Dandy Spot-A-Psycho-Logist badge!!

xoxo C.